Only connect! We are told. Yet we just have to look around on Valentine's Day for a sobering reminder that there is less intimacy in the world than there appears to be. Popular culture assures us that couples, friends, family members and even strangers on a train can easily find that sense of deep connection and mutual understanding. Yet in an age of consumption and new media, where friending has become a verb, genuine intimacy seems harder to find than ever.Drawing widely on novels and films as well as psychology, sociology and philosophy, Ziyad Marar offers four lenses through which to view this nebulous concept. He also details the many barriers that impede our hopes, including the illusion of self knowledge, lack of imagination and empathy, the wishful thinking that leads to politeness or the avoidance of healthy conflict, as well as the many insecurities that keep true intimacy at bay.Often confused with love, intimacy is in many ways more important. In this bold new exploration Marar shows how the pursuit of that emotional, conspiratorial but ultimately kind (rather than nice) bond with another person is central to a life well lived.