These are the things that I've always wanted: 

To get the top grades in my class. 

To make my grandmother proud. 

And most of all, proof that I could succeed where the rest of my family had not: a Stanford acceptance letter, early admission. 

My mother and my sister were obsessed with boys and love and sex. So obsessed that they lost sight of their futures, of what they wanted. And in the end, they lost everything. 

I'll never let a boy distract me. I promised my grandmother that. 

But that was before Tate. 

Before the biggest pop star on the planet took an interest in me. 

Before private planes and secret dates and lyrics meant for me alone. 

There's so much I don't know. Like why he left music. Where he goes when we're not together. What dark past he's hiding. But when we kiss, the future feels far away. And now…I'm not sure what I want.