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My Misadventures As a Teenage Rock Star

by: Raskin, Joyce; Chu, Carol

My Misadventures As a Teenage Rock Star

by: Raskin, Joyce; Chu, Carol

ISBN 13:
9780547393117
ISBN 10:
0547393113
Edition: Original
Format: Paperback
Copyright: 06/13/2011
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

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My Misadventures As a Teenage Rock Star > ISBN13: 9780547393117

Summary

Rock 'n' roll isn't just about sex and drugs. It's about self-expression, lasting friendships, and self-empowerment. That's what Alex learns after she starts playing bass for a rock band in this almost true story. Joyce Raskin, author and musician, culls from her memories to create this funny, touching, and honest look at what it's like to be a teenager, a girl, and a rock star all at the same time.Also included are a note from the author, instructions on how to play basic guitar chords, advice on songwriting, and more!

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Excerpts

Hello, My Name Is AlexHello, my name is Alex. I’m fourteen years old. I’m a rock star. My book is all about what it’s like being a rock star, a teenager, and a girl—all at the same time (which isa lot). Being fourteen is hard, but playing music helps me through all the tough times.I wasn’t always a rock star. Before I turned fourteen, here’s what my life was like . . .(Flashback begins. Hum flashback-type music here in your mind.Di di di di di di di).We have been transported to the room of a young teenager in a typical house in the suburbs of New Jersey. The girl sits in front of her pink unicorn mirror gazing at her reflection. This is Alex, short for Alexis. She’s a short, pasty, shy, greasy-haired kid with a face full of acne. The kids in her middle school call her Zit Fit. She looks like she’s ten. Her biggest obsession is comparing herself with models and movie stars. Not very healthy; guess that’s why it’s called it an obsession.Alex struggles with many different hairstyles as she tries to make herself look pretty.A side ponytail, just like that teen pop star Haley. Yes? No.Perhaps the cheerleader ponytail? Not!A big barrette. Now she looks like she’s eight. This is so not working.Alex messes her hair up and shrieks,"Ahhhhh!"

Her mother shouts, "Everything all right in there, Alexis?""Yes," Alex shouts back. "No," she mumbles to herself. "Everything is definitely not all right."Alexmust, must, mustlearn how to make herself pretty! Even her name isn’t pretty. Alexis. Yuck. A boy’s name for sure. What were her parents thinking when they named her Alexis, AKA Alex? Were they hoping for a boy? Maybe they suddenly experienced some mental confusion after her birth and forgot they had a daughter? It’s possible. As her parents are pretty nice people, they would never stick her with an ugly name on purpose.Alex’s mom is kind of a hippy and really into yoga and meditating and all that stuff. She often tells Alex that she needs to get in touch with her inner self to find her inner beauty.Alex attempts the following things to find her so-called inner beauty:

Alex begins writing in her diary all her inner thoughts.I am a nice person. I am a good person. I am an okay person. I am a sad person because I have no friends. I am a loser because I am so ugly. I am ugly, ugly, ugly. Why am I so ugly? Ugly, ugly, ugly, UGLY, UGLY.She gets stuck on rewriting the worduglyall the way down the page with curly flower decorations on the letters. She throws the diary onto the floor and begins sobbing hysterically.

Once the tears dry and she’s in a state of quiet calm, Alex tries meditation to unload her chakras. She begins with theOms while sitting in the lotus position. Eventually theOms turn into this chant:

"Om,I hate pretty girls,Om,who are blond with cute button noses.Om,I want to be them.Om,why was I born this way?Om,help me, please!Om,someone?Om,anyone,oh,listening?Oh, Aghhh, Oh, uh,the silence is killing me.Om,and this position is, too.Ugh."