Messages : The Communication Skills Book
ISBN: 9781572245921 | 1572245921
Edition: 3rdFormat: Paperback
Publisher: New Harbinger Pubns Inc
Pub. Date: 3/1/2009
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The classic, best-selling communication skills book,Messages, helps readers build their communication skills in all areas of life. This guide helps readers become adept in active listening, reading body language, identifying communication styles, conflict resolution, public speaking, and more.
| Introduction | p. 1 |
| Basic Skills | |
| Listening | p. 5 |
| Real Vs. Pseudo Listening | |
| Blocks to Listening | |
| Assessing Your Listening Blocks | |
| Four Steps to Effective Listening | |
| Total Listening | |
| Listening for Couples | |
| Self-Disclosure | p. 24 |
| Rewards of Self-Disclosure | |
| Blocks ... MORE | |
| Optimal Levels of Self-Disclosure | |
| Assessing Your Self-Disclosure | |
| Practice in Self-Disclosure | |
| Expressing | p. 35 |
| The Four Kinds of Expression | |
| Whole Messages | |
| Contaminated Messages | |
| Preparing Your Messages | |
| Practicing Whole Messages | |
| Rules for Effective Expression | |
| Advanced Skills | |
| Body Language | p. 59 |
| Body Movements | |
| Spatial Relationships | |
| Paralanguage and Metamessages | p. 70 |
| The Elements of Paralanguage | |
| Changing Your Paralanguage | |
| Metamessages | |
| Coping with Metamessages | |
| Hidden Agendas | p. 80 |
| The Eight Agendas | |
| Purpose of the Agendas | |
| Transactional Analysis | p. 89 |
| Parent, Child, and Adult Messages | |
| Analyzing Your Communications | |
| Kinds of Transactions | |
| Keeping Your Communications Clean | |
| Clarifying Language | p. 104 |
| Understanding a Model | |
| Challenging the Limits of a Model | |
| Challenging Distortions in a Model | |
| Some Final | |
| Clarifications | |
| Assertiveness Training | p. 125 |
| Your Legitimate Rights | |
| Three Communication Styles | |
| Identifying Communication Styles | |
| Your Assertiveness Goals | |
| Assertive Expression | |
| Assertive Listening | |
| Combining Assertive Expression and Listening | |
| Responding to Criticism | |
| Special Assertive Strategies | |
| Assertiveness Skills Practice | |
| Fair Fighting | p. 150 |
| Unfair Fighting | |
| Identifying Unfair Fighting Styles | |
| Fair Fighting | |
| Fair Fight Rules | |
| Your Script for Change | |
| Validation Strategies | p. 161 |
| What Is Validation? | |
| Why Does Validation Work? | |
| What Validation Is Not | |
| Components of Validation | |
| Successful Validating Strategies | |
| The Power of Validation | |
| Negotiation | p. 173 |
| Four Stages of Negotiation | |
| Dealing with Conflict | |
| Rules of Principled Negotiation | |
| When the Going Gets Tough | |
| Social Skills | |
| Prejudgment | p. 191 |
| Prejudgment Traps | |
| Stereotypes | |
| Approval and Disapproval in Prejudgment | |
| Parataxic Distortions | |
| Perpetuating Illusions | |
| Clarifying First Impressions | |
| Making Contact | p. 205 |
| Fear of Strangers | |
| Guidelines for Making Contact | |
| The Art of Conversation | |
| Putting It All Together | |
| Family Skills | |
| Couples Skills | p. 223 |
| What Makes a Good Relationship? | |
| Schemas | |
| Couples Systems | |
| Keeping Your Relationship Strong | |
| Communicating with Children | p. 246 |
| Listening | |
| Expressing | |
| Joint Problem Solving | |
| When to Let Go | |
| When You Have to Say No | |
| The Point Is... | |
| Family Communications | p. 265 |
| Family Communication Disorders | |
| Family Pathology | |
| Family Systems | |
| How to Keep Family Communications Healthy | |
| Public Skills | |
| Influencing Others | p. 285 |
| Ineffective Strategies for Influencing Change | |
| Effective Strategies for Influencing Others | |
| Your Plan for Influencing Change | |
| Lisa's Plan for Influencing Change | |
| Public Speaking | p. 295 |
| Defining Your Purpose | |
| Outlining the Subject | |
| Presentation | |
| Organization | |
| Audience | |
| Analysis | |
| Style | |
| Supporting Materials | |
| The Outline | |
| Delivery | |
| Dealing with Stage Fright | |
| Interviewing | p. 312 |
| Clarifying What You Want | |
| If You Are the Interviewer | |
| If You Are the Interviewee | |
| Conclusion | |
| Recommended Reading | p. 343 |
| References | p. 347 |
| Index | p. 349 |
| Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved. |
Matthew McKay, Ph.D., is a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. Martha Davis, Ph.D., was a psychologist in the department of psychiatry at Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in Santa Clara, CA, for more than thirty years prior to her retirement. Patrick Fanning is a professional writer in the mental health field and coauthor of many psychology and communications titles.
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